Repetition

Every late night has begun to feel like a repetition of the night before

I think I’m beginning to find myself pulling for the early morning hours

In hope that I will find someone

Or something

That will ease my mind and bring me revelations

About myself and about life

Straining for interaction with a new energy

A new perspective

Not in desperation for friends

But for conversations

Feeling deprived from the part of me that I found in you

The mysterious part of me

And whether or not I will ever experience it again

Is the reason that letting go is not even a thing I could take into consideration

And I used to reserve these hours

For opening up my chest and feeling my heart strings break

And now I just feel the need to feel

The want to feel

How I did for you

And how you made me feel for life

I hardly get the pain in my chest these days

But I also hardly feel

 

~Megan

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