Cigarettes

He’s too much but it’s never enough and you’re more than enough but it was never too much

Do you understand me when I say that I started smoking to get the taste of you out of my mouth?

But it began to remind me of him so I couldn’t help but spit it out after every drag

I knew I was right when I said that people like me shouldn’t fall in love because I’ve never had great balance anyway

I considered writing the things that you said on the side of the cigarettes so I could take those words into my chest just one more time

But I couldn’t bring myself to let them have their chance at trying to kill me

I felt like you were more of the lighter that struck into having myself let him in

I lose you especially when I need you, anyways

I’m fully aware that eventually he will fade

But I feel like for him I’m an addiction and I’m dreading bringing myself to have someone ache for me

~Megan

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